Sensitive

To those who know me, will sure know me for my good memory in remembering not important stuff but those tiny bits of details that most of you don't even bother remembering.
I must say its very true.
I'm good in remembering dates and things happen.
I don't know why.
They just stuck in my mind for a long time.
That's why I'm always the one who people refer when it involve dates and events.

I wish I could apply this on my own studies.
I used to be applying them on studies.
I don't know eversince after form 5 I stop using my brain power?
Have I become super lazy to think with my own brain after the 6 months break?
I don't know.
I just feel so emo and angry and pissed with myself for not doing anything about it.
Whenever people asking why I'm not applying my powerful memory in my studies especially the bf nowadays he keeps mentioning this, I'll get very sensitive then emo or merajuk.
Its not that I don't want, it just that I don't know.
It might seems like a lame excuse, I know.
But then, you think I don't want to get smarter if I can?

So emo now.
Hmph!