Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Happy Two Friends

This just have to happen at this time.
Can you please hold your curiosity in wanting to know everything so badly, every single time?

Don't you know, sometimes, something, is better to be left unknown.
Only then, things will still be the same and unaffected.

And please, stop imagining things!
Everything is going to be okay.


Sunday, June 12, 2011

Discover ze Love Secret Recipe.

Heart this chemistry that we are sharing.
Regardless whether we will be meeting at the end point.
I truly feel blessed and lucky to have you here with me, at least for now.


“一定一定会有好事发生的,我们就是为了遇见那些好事才努力活下来的。

I believe in this.

Monday, May 30, 2011

Ding Dong, you've been dumbfounded!

Thanks to whoever who trying to act as though they know me well and who is loser enough to do that.
Just to let you know, whatever you do, you're just increasing my blog hit, and wasting your time in thinking so hard for trying to make me feel bad.
Somehow I always ended up laughing so hard. :D

So thank you for ze entertainment and for making my life so interesting and colorful!

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

This is Life.

Sigh.
RB is forever that observant, he always know what I'm up to.
Finally get to have a proper talk with him about ze decision.


He kept asking for the reason, so I told him few reasons, the sub one.
He knew those weren't the main reason, so he mentioned about few things and told me that was just what he guess.
I didn't deny, cause those were also part of the reasons which contributed to ze decision.
I teared a little.
He had been so nice to me and so patient.
He asked to stay, to reconsider my decision.
Felt shaky with ze decision for a while, then a sudden silent between us.



He shared with me of what he observed in me, and also other knowledge and improvement can be made.
He told me its okay, I'm still young and there's still long way to go.
He told me to give him a call if there's anything, and that he will make arrangement for me.
He told me...
There are too many things that he told me, I thank God for all these!

Before the conversation ended, he said,"Hope you'll be able to find your positive charges real soon."

I said, "Hmm..."

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Because your apology is insincere.

Received an unexpected phone call when I was in the bank yesterday.
I blinked for a while trying to recognize the voice, until the caller told me ze name, I was like stunned.
Heart was beating super fast.
Hope everything will goes smoothly after this.

Best of luck! :)

Thursday, May 5, 2011

I DARE YOU



Thought of the jiak sai definition that 阿群 made out of ze theory.
Never failed to make everyone laughs.

Decision, decision, decision.
I've finally told RB about it, and he asked why?
Never really get to talk to him about it, further discussion is needed but he is super duper busy, so everything tergendala till further discussion.
Bahh, I feel so weird.
I can't believe that I've finally made up my mind about this, like really finally, after months of having the thought playing in my mind. ==

I don't know what is going to come in my way in the future.
I guess, I've learn to be more spontaneous and not let other burdens affect my decision.
I think, being in this field really trained my EQ to an extend that, I don't get too bother or too offended by some nonsense.
I'm really thankful for all those awful moments that I went through throughout the journey, which mold me to who I am now, in a way.



And I think, patience can consider as the most quality that I've gain along the way.
Alright, not to say I'm a very very patient person, but then I've learn not to get mad over stupid things *insert laughs*.
At least won't black face during work, or in front of other people, cause cannot bring personal emotion to work ma...

Too much of randomness recently.
But I likey.
Looking forward for DSLR VS LOMO photo outings with monkey sekalian, Snowflake and polaroid date with 阿群, Steamboat with 阿宅。
Oh no, I can see my purse bleeding! ><

 

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

疯狂的赛车



一整天,心情无比的烂透了。
可以是因为一个月了。可以是因为PMS.可以是因为神经搭错线。可以是因为下雨天让整个人很忧郁。

送了老弟回宿舍,终于按奈不住,崩溃了。

下雨的夜晚,一个人开着车,大声喊着,哭着,发泄了。
短短几分钟后,一切恢复平静。

妈的,很像在看戏那样。



 

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Why you sounds different?

我也没发现说,我在和她聊天时的语气有什么不一样,直到她问了我这个问题:“怎么你今天听起来,不像平时的你?”
才想起了,我约她出去的原因。
此时,企图隐藏起来的淡淡忧伤,不小心释放了一些。

这样也好,至少没有经过欢送会这个阶段,眼泪就不会决堤。
你不在,日子还是一样的过。
虽然,每每粗心弄伤这里那里,会想起那一段段关心担心的对白。
最近,常常会不小心脚滑,撞到旧患。想起某夜他给我猜的冷笑话:森林里什么动物最容易跌倒?答案是狐狸!因为狐狸狡猾(脚滑)。呵呵!
最近,双脚频频抽筋。想起了那时他凭着我在电话中隐约说过的地址,带着自己煲好的凉茶,在我那区绕来绕去。看到他出现在家门前,是感动的,觉得他傻的可爱。知道说我累,脚抽筋,就捉着我按摩。


都过去啦。。。
一个月,时间很努力的在冲淡一切。
他离开了,去逐梦了。
自己也做好准备,迎接接下来要面对的事情。
就这样,我们很快速的在人生中的交叉点遇见,又再次分开。

此刻心情很复杂。

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

所以,现在是???

每当夜被清晨的曙光取代,回复了一些意识,一股淡淡的忧愁哀伤涌入心头。
我们都变成了我们最不想成为的人。
那感觉,总是怪怪的。

Saturday, April 23, 2011

Stand By Me

阿群:

  • hmm
  • do watever tht makes u comfortable
  • no matter how
  • i support u
    :)
  • support aliceeeeee

    • haha
    • not grandmother story la
    • it's sth happen around u that i need 2 concern with

      :p

阿宅:
我肩膀借你,乖。别伤心,我回来肩膀借你咬~有什么事我都能让你倾诉~



*人生中出现了两个人,一个总是陪我哈哈大笑,一个总是陪我恶魔,都是我嘴角上扬的原因和原动力 :)*

Thursday, April 21, 2011

无厘头,跟着感觉走

一早来到公司,拼了命的赶着photoshop一大堆的照片。
忙里偷闲,开了开面子书,发现他的留言,半小时之前的事了。
回了他,亲爱的YY拨电来报到说他从韩国回来啦...
重点是,他买了手信,面膜一堆给我!*开心死*
聊了一下,继续拼到下午3点,交完报告吃午餐去。
一切看似普通上班日。

下午的天空,下了场倾盆大雨。
可爱的林同学拨电给我说了一大堆的东西,笑着叫她别紧张。
穿着粉红吊带,但这大雨的天气怎么还比平日热啊?

然后,大伙儿开会去,剩下小猫两三只各自做着自己手头上的工作。
拨了几通电话,看到了熟悉的画面。
以前实习时,也曾经蹲坐在地上画着白板上的线,差不多两年前的事了。:)

发现说,原来许久没有近距离看着他。
与他有多久没有真正的,静静地,聊着天。
他,突然开口说起他之后的去向和计划,然后两人开始聊起一些近未来的事情。
我说,跟着感觉走,别顾虑太多。
因为机会真的很难得,而且机会也永远只给有准备好的人。
静静地在一旁听着他说话的声音,好好听的声音,要放进1TB的大脑记忆卡存档。


回到家,和老妹聊了下,眼泪亲不自禁的滑落脸颊。
是不争气了点,可是也是一下下而已。
至今,还是觉得那第一眼感觉的很不可思议。
嗯... 就收着那时的感觉好了。

我们家阿宅阿群还是很定时的每天或每隔一天就找我聊天。
很可爱的咯。。。
每天都害我笑个半死。
阿宅还是一样的害羞,不对,有好了点,至少见面不许要用面子书交谈也可以。呵呵!
阿群则常常找歌找笑话给我听和看。虽然有时真的觉得很烂,但还是有办法让我开心地笑!
感恩,我有这么可爱的朋友。
^^



只想说 *爱情没有对错,没有前后先分,而且绝对是自私的*

我不会去生气或讨厌任何伤害过我的人,再怎么气、失望、难过,我选择keep it with myself.


所以,任何人也没资格用他们的尺来衡量我。


况且,在不知道事情的来龙去脉之下,胡乱下评论,会显得很笨。



好啦,写了一堆有的没的,是时候和周先生约会啦...
晚安。

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

What are words?

工作,开始忙了起来,分散了注意力。
我很好,真的很好。。。
只是,当开会开到很迟时,不禁想起一起为梦想打拼的日子。
那一刹那,我有小难过了一下下。
不为什么,就想起了一些话。 

Thursday, April 7, 2011

曾经,一次幸福的机会。

我敌不过时间留下的痕迹,也敌不过那真相的残酷。
笑得疯颠,却没办法歇斯底里。
疯了,原来我真的很笨。
泪水,在无数次决堤后,干。
从来就不会说气话,即使现在,我什么都不是。

太敏感,不是件好事。
有着1TB的大脑记忆卡,更是件坏事。
每一次,每一个故事情节片段细节,依然清晰。
不想猜疑的,不想懂的,却总会无意间发现。
请不要因为责任而对我好,我会很难过的。

一整夜的独白,疯癫后,睡着。
 

****************************************
(分割线,那是昨夜的负面情绪)
****************************************
刚才,与好姐妹约会去,享受我们久违了的二人世界。
知道说,她很担心我,所以她约了我,还坚持我们要扮美美放松一下。呵呵。
昨夜,当我崩溃的哭着,隐约在电话听到她其实哽咽了,却不敢在我面前哭泣。
她说,她能感受到我真的很痛,她担心的是,我这一次会用上更长的时间来忘记,所以她一直和我说了很多东西。
她说,他是老天爷派来的使者,好让我忘了一些事。现在,他的任务完成了,也是功成身退的时候。
她说,听我叙述着他的故事,知道说他是个细心的好男人。她相信,只要我感觉到他是,他就是。她相信我。还告诉,应该庆幸的是我遇到那么一个好男人,至少,曾经拥有过,幸福过。
她说,为什么你总是那样的从来不为自己自私一次? 总是那么的心软?我说,因为我本来就是这样的人,我没办法自私。我本来就很心疼他们那段感情。

从昨夜到刚才,其实想了很多很多。
的确,5年多和1.5个月,根本就不能拿以相提并论。
想起了一些他说的话,也读到了‘黑白配’11年爱情长跑的故事。我想,我能理解他心里那份感受。
所以,决定了一个决定。
约会回来,凌晨一时许,我真的觉得我一定要告诉他我的决定。

拨电过去,他接了。嗯,好像是在某个地方。
与他聊了12分钟07秒。很短的一通电话,却记载着一个很美好的故事句点,真正的大结局。
依然是朋友,那是肯定的。
他说了,thank you.
也没想到说,自己毅然做了这个决定,松了一口气吧?
嗯,我会加油的,努力寻找属于自己的。:)

不晓得说,自己这次会用多久时间走出。
完全好了,那是骗人的。
那是用心付出过的,不是说要忘就能忘掉。
还是会想起,想起过去的许多许多。
也许,就像他所说的,发生的,都是好事。

发现,我原来是个超级无敌幸福宝宝。
这段时间,知道说,让很多人担心了。
一直提醒我要记得吃东西。哈哈!
放心,我真的有吃啦,不会让自己饿着。

Cerenna, I think we are fated to be connected in this way. Its always like that that we go through all those sweet and haram moments together. I feel so much better after the meet up, totally full of positive energy! Hehe. :) Thanks, thanks for listening and being a real good friend. Love you lots!

陈婉仪,从一开始到现在,你就是那个知道最多最多的人。对不起,让你担心了。很想现在抱着你说,我好很多了!谢谢你一直陪我说话,听了我说了很多很多的东西。
  
罗慧欣,很突然的你知道了。哈哈!很想很想你,期待着下次你回来的时候。

彭佩玲,故意写华语的。你就慢慢读吧!哈哈!还没来得及和你碰面讲好消息,就直接告诉你坏消息。你很好笑,直接说可以到你家去,哭个彻底,重新振作!谢啦,可爱到...

我家老妹,第一次在你面前这么脆弱的叙述着我的故事,至到哽咽流泪。知道你也很担心我,我有感受到哦!
    
陈智民,你这兄弟永远就是那样的无厘头搞笑。听到我出事了,竟然从英国拨电给我,爱死你了。虽然,你还是说了很多很多根本就是很欠扁的话,可是还是很感动你的那通电话。想你了,快点从英国回来!
 
陈卓群,一年多没见面,一见面就是这么一个无厘头事件。凌晨两点多,你开着和室友借来的车来找我时,我真的很感动。虽然很累,但你还是努力撑到5点,还一直逗我笑。第二天起床后,看到的还是我,还是一样陪我过了难熬的傍晚。谢谢你,很开心4年前认识了你这家伙。哈!
  
陈伟廷,你这人永远就是那么的有义气!总是那么的像大哥哥般照顾我,虽然我没完全把你的话听进去,也拒绝了你要你家老弟来载我回家的好意,可是我还是很珍惜你的。谢谢你在陪女友的同时,听我说话!

害羞宅男,就让你神秘些。没想到说我会因为这样而和你有一大串东西聊,在你面前就真的是很放肆的忧郁难过伤心。你是好人!谢谢你的陪伴!可是我真的希望,你不要那么害羞,不然下次要和聚会时,我就得带电脑出门了。==

长气May Baby, 我不会忘记,曾经,我们逆风一起飞,幸福过... 谢谢你的那一大堆的回忆! 恭喜你成为了‘刻骨铭心3号’! == 哈哈!

写完才发现,我真的有很多陈姓好朋友。==
爱你们!希望我们都会幸福快乐久久! :D


Saturday, April 2, 2011

其实...



2011的愚人节,经历了痛彻心扉的一夜。
已经忘了有多久没这么痛的呐喊大哭,像个疯子。


一个人躲在4号房。
一直坚信,好人有好报,可是我并不是好人,所以并不会有好报。
一直很害怕听别人对我说:"请你一定要相信我。" 每次都是那么的让人心碎。
一直以为老天爷在开了那么多次玩笑后,总算要眷顾我。结果还是在开完笑,让我狠狠地再摔一跤。


相信,真的就会有奇迹吗?
还是那一句,要善待自己,因为只有自己最了解自己?
或是,Everything happened for a good reason?


很痛,很迷茫...



Wednesday, March 16, 2011

怎么办?

天使和恶魔继续在耳边说话.


决定,每一天都在改变.
不想说太快做出选择而做错决定.


我还是有时不懂我自己在做什么. T.T

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Cry.


I know about those stupid policies...
I could have explain but I never do that.

Perhaps, I need higher EQ to block all these stupid misunderstanding from me.  

Monday, January 24, 2011

Its ok, you can talk to me.

For now, nothing beats the disappointment when you woke up just to find out that, it was just a dream.


*I really thought its happening in real life.*

Friday, January 14, 2011

Mad sleepy...

眼睛真的可以再红肿一点。


会记住那种很刺很刺的语气。
你如果那么强,其实为什么你还是会呆在同一个阶段?
很好奇你可曾想过这个问题?


很少生气,不代表没有脾气。
请不要有践踏别人的自尊和自信举动。


再无奈,也得忍耐。
因为那是礼貌上的尊重。

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Take care, not too long before it ends.

I'm losing ze passion and motivation.
Definitely not a good sign.
Where do I go, if this is not ze place to stay? 

Tell me, lead me, save me, from all these doubts.
I'm confused. Lost.

Friday, January 7, 2011

庆幸,我敏感。



那是很不知不觉的发生。
很努力的撑着,以为会没事。
意识开始模糊,我看见了一些很零乱的画面。
乱乱的,分不清真实还是梦境。
也不知过了多久,听到老妈担心的声音,听到椅子倒下的声音。
隐约感觉到爸妈紧紧地扶着我那没重心的身体。
原来,我,昏倒啦。。。
冷汗不停的飙,眼泪很奇怪的直流。
应该是太痛了吧???